Friday, September 25, 2015

7th Avenue Blues

Hi kids!!

I know it's been like FOREVER since you last heard from me. But of course you know I've had tons of shit happen. My life stays more eventful than I'd like and it takes me a minute to keep up lol. 

Hmm. But now to figure out where to begin?? 

Well several months ago I was having issues with my job. Remember the cashiering job I had?? Yeah. I ended up getting garnished for student loans which suck ass. Regardless of what I did they felt justified to take $200 out of my pay per month. What sucked to be working full time 40 hours a week, hard labor and I'm left with less than a part time pay. Yeah it wasn't cool at all. What made it even worst my bills increased. I lost my food stamps and I was struggling hard and bad!! There was so much stress I had to do part time. I still got garnished but not as much and I ended up picking up odd jobs to make ends kinda sorta meet. 

So in June I made some adjustments to m schedule prior in May so I could be off so that I could work my second job as a server. My boss never honored my request and that's when I knew I had it. I up and quit my job. Not the best decision. And I would've like to have had another job secured before I left but that wasn't happening. They wanted to penalize me for missing work or fuck up my days off to suit everybody else. Like I cuss my boss out. Like she wanted to me like I was her worst worker but I'm like lady please. When one of your favorites don't show up you calling my fucking number. She had the nerve to tell me that I wouldn't find a job better than that one. I'm like fuck out of here!! I'll find a better job. One that'll give me my benefits and won't fuck with my paycheck either. 

So I was out of work for 2-3 weeks before I found my current job. It's further out but the pay is more. Scheduling is flexible and fixed. And I get as much overtime as I want. Hell I get paid to work my lunch and they feed me too! I sit on my ass and eat snacks all day. Lol. Doesn't get any better than that?? Plus I was getting $3 more. They work with me. Even when I need to go to my other two jobs. I'm contented with that. I'm not going to say I absolutely LOVE working for the electric company but it's beats a blank. Plus I've been able to get the bills paid down a lot quicker than I thought. And that makes me happy. So for now I want to keep this job as long as possible so I can go to another customer service job that'll be closer to home or pay me more. Personally I'm hoping for both. 

Hmm what else. Oh yeah. At moment I was in a relationship. Go figure. I think I've mentioned him before. 

I met him LAST October. Right before Halloween. I had just gotten off work and he's driving pass and waves and I waved back. He popped a U-turn in the middle of rush hour traffic to come sit at the bus stop and talk with me. It was probably the most perfect moment I've ever experienced. Then it got perfecter. He was working a good job. Had his own house, car, no kids, no crazy interfering exes. Motherfucker was perfect as hell. For a minute I was excited because I got exactly what I wanted but the messed up part about it was the fact that he was too much of what I wanted. The first few months we had were good but then it went down hill from there. He wouldn't return my calls or texts. He didn't want to spend time with me. Didn't want an actual relationship anymore but then again I wasn't allowed to be single either and that pissed me off. You don't want me but you also don't any anybody else to have me either and that was so fucked up to me. So we broke up for awhile. More like stopped talking to each other. 

Then after this 5month break. He decides to message me I guess due to loneliness. And we got back together and he was talking much shit. And like a dumb ass I believed him and believed things would change and possible become more concrete oppose to being so up in the air. Yeah. Not happening. It was like on and off of bullshit. He would get jealous when guys would approach me or talk to me on Facebook and I'm like why?? You don't wanna go out or give more than 5 minutes of attention. Then the sex got boring and predictable. He was the only one allowed to have an orgasm. I felt abused and misused. I was being taken for granted and I wasn't ok with that. Though he felt otherwise. So after 11 long months of off and on. I finally told him how I felt and broke up with him. Can't you believe that the motherfucker had the nerve to ignore what I said and just basically tell me he's coming over to my house. Wanted to tell me how he moved closer to where I live to be with me. It's like he wasn't that far away any wanted to tell me that he couldn't come and see me because I lived too far away but he couldn't drive to a place that was 14hrs away. I was only 30minutes away from him. He was a lunatic. I don't regret meeting him and I'm happy I did. He created a situation that I vowed would never happen. But I learned something though. While I was making him a better man for the next girl whoever she maybe. He made me a better woman for the next man. Little did I know it or not. But the lesson that hit home the most was the fact that even though he was exactly what I WANTED. He wasn't what I needed. And I thought about that long and hard. Like you're what I want and I was tryin so hard to make it work but he was soo soo SO BAD for me. And holding on to him and the relationship wasn't going to change anything or make anything better. Had to let it go. 

Believe or not I met someone else. Lol. I like him lots. I think I'm so infatuated with him because he didn't treat me like another piece of ass. He wanted to be friends and I was ok with that. He's a complete goofball and I don't feel uncomfortable with him. We can hang out and just enjoy each other's company. I like that a lot. What makes it even more ironic is the fact that he's not perfect. He's not what I want or that who "your type" he is so flawed in so many ways but I like it lol. Plus he's been making me happy in such a way that even my roommate thinks he's my boyfriend and we're not even there yet. And who would've ever thought I'd meet him at work?? Lmao! He even trained me for my job. Probably not the best secenario but hey shit happens right?? And I can't wait to see what happens. Plus I love fooling around with him during lunch hahaha. It's not often so no guys we aren't doing the ultimate porno at work scene. Hell he even told me no when I asked for sex. That makes me mad but appreciative because he's being considerate of me and apparently wants more than that. Even told me so lol. And I'm actually ok with it. 

Oh yeah I have a roommate too. For a minute she was a pain in my ass. But it's like fine. It's half ass working now lol. I'm wondering how long that's actually gonna last. I'm hoping not for long. I be trying to have some adult time with the new Bae lol. 

But other than those juicy tidbits life is pretty good. I love my new friends who are like my paradise! I guess I must say I'm happy to have a somewhat normal period to. Even though it's been cramping my style like crazy for this entire month. But that last pregnancy scare was not something I was ready for. I need to think long hard and on the toilet before considering even making the slightest passing thought about getting pregnant. Maybe. I dunno my new guy got me doing things I wouldn't normally do too. 

We'll see what happens in due time. I'll try to keep you guys and dolls posted. Plus I have plenty of things else to still talk about too!! 

I love you heaps!!

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