Wednesday, May 29, 2013

The String Of Things


As I'm sitting out here in this 80 degree weather watching my up-the-street neighbor's son manicure her land and the one next to hers. You know they want it to look gorgeous, like something you woulda seen on Robin Leech.

Anyway, I don't think I told you guys about him being a super creeper.

The woman next door to his mother, her daughter has a huge crush on him. But he tries his best to avoid her. The house next door lived a girl there with her two kids who's aunt used to live across the street. They both has since moved and the aunt's daughter lives there. I think he was hooking up with the girl and would always come see her late at night, park on the darkest part of the street and stay and leave still during the twilight hours.

Well last year, he came up like he usually does cuts the lawns, tends to the bushes, sweep and all that. I occasionally looked his way from time to time. Later that evening I went down to the McDonalds. As I  was entering the Mickey D's because I had to potty, he approaches me.

Here's how the conversation went:

Him: Its nice to finally see you out of the house and off the porch. It's good to get out and do things. Especially in your case since you're young.

I'm standing there staring like what the hell is this guy following me or something?? All I could do was say yeah and sort of nod.

Him: Well I know you don't know me but I'm friends with your parents. It was so sad to see your father go, I truly cried about that for days.

Did this creeper just tell me he had a bromance for my father???

Him: Well you know I live up the street. Matter of fact directly across the street from you. I must say it's nice seeing out like this.

So I stood there as he was trying to corner me. I guess the look on my face resonated disgust and I wasn't falling for his retro ass played out pick up lines.

Him: Well you don't know me....

No shit Sherlock.

Him: My mom is Mrs. C from up the street.

When it dawned on me, I'm like ok so what the hell is this dude talking its nice to see me out and stuff. I couldn't help but get disgusted that he's 20+ years older than me and he thinks he's the cat's pajamas!!

From that day forth, I watch him. I didn't like being creeped on.


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