Wednesday, July 4, 2012

Middle Maintenance

I never really considered myself high maintenance. I may act like or seem like I am. But never was, don't plan on adopting that as a characteristic trait either.

To me a high maintenance woman was always someone who blew money constantly, had the dog, a home in every state, was mostly a career-minded woman but with a touch of gold digger in her. A woman who was nitpicky and did as she pleases without worrying about people's feelings or running over whoever got in her way. A bad chick, with some serious issues. Where only materialistic items made her more happy and pleased than any actually humanoid contact could. She was vain and self centered and meaner than a rattlesnake on a 150 degree day.

I didn't want to be her. If anyone I wanted to be a mommy lol.

However I was brought up and raised in a nicer situation than most. Given the fact I had experienced what dinners out to a nice restaurant were like, going to plays and operas were enjoyable and traveling and have the nicer (and not necessarily the finer) things in life. I knew and learned how to dress and what matches what and what colors looked the best. I got to go to many different programs and experience a lot of things. None of which made me high maintenance or bourgeois or saddity even. It made me a better person and to know how to act given the place and circumstance.

As I got older, it became a problem. Because of jealous people and those who never got to experience such things. They made fun and judge me and considered me bougie and high maintenance. But it never truly bothered me. Because I didn't really care then. However over the past few years in trying to find a potential and worth while mate (be it man or woman, but in this case a man). Dressing up and getting pretty was a cinch for me. I did so and looked presentable. However I was ignored and my efforts went unnoticed. The more I was ignored or partially acknowledged, the more I began to realize that people thought I was bougie and high maintenance. When I really wasn't. Now if I went out the house with my dirty clothes and uncombed hair and smelly self—I'm trifling, I'm a bum, I have no self respect and I'm this and I'm that. If I clean up fix my hair and thrown on some make up with a nice top and skirt and sandals that match my purse to a T—I'm high maintenance.

It wasn't until the other night, I really didn't have a word for what I was. I wasn't low maintenance. Never was and wasn't going to be in no life time. Then again on the same token I wasn't high maintenance either. That night as I searched for solutions to my many problems, I found this website that was basically a social networking site and it gave examples of what to put in the description boxes.

So it mentioned:

I'm not high maintenance and I'm definitely not low maintenance, I'm more like in the middle of those two—Middle Maintenance

It caught my attention and made me really think. No I don't have to have my nails and hair done every other week or be picky about what I eat or drink. However I don't wear make up to go grocery shopping and I can settle with having a months worth of bad hair days and ugly nails. But I still like nice things and I know when I have to settle and sacrifice. I'm not going to say I'm ok with a bug infested watering hole that serves bad food and smells like pee. On the other hand, I don't have to go to a 5-star restaurant that has 40 forks, 12 knives and 10 spoons plus a 15 course meal. I'm happy with pancakes from Eat-n-Park or Pizza and hot wings lol. It really doesn't take much to make me happy. Plus I have a fetish for ties and I get a total Lady Boner when I see a guy in a 3 piece suit with a matching tie—I am so ready to take my clothes off then XD lmao!

Found this awesome picture on a site called Middle Maintenance :D

And you know what?? There's perfectly nothing wrong with being Middle Maintenance. Not only do I know how to sacrifice but I've experience many struggles and a lot of those can't do or can't be done moments. It's made me a better person and a better woman. I also know what it's like to have nice things in life as well. Whether its nice clothes, shoes, accessories or going out to a fancy place at least once. It creates a great memory and gives me the knowledge and regards of how to act like a lady. I'm very proud of that. People, especially men, can judge me all they want. But I know that they're either intimidated, jealous or can never truly be on my level no matter how hard they try. It's not out of vanity I say this, but the truth.

Never let someone judge you or tell you about yourself. Only you know what it's likes to be you. Just because you like nice things or know how to act or like to get pampered every once in a while or even seem a bit bougie or strange to others, doesn't make you high maintenance. You're middle maintenance and be proud of that!

I know I am ^_^.


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