Sunday, March 3, 2013

Two Does Not Simply "Keep Calm"

SO last night, I went to the grocery store to pick up a few necessary items like milk, cereal and a newspaper among several other things. Anyway as I made my way back to the car in the frigid cold. It was a lot colder than I assumed it was and I wanted to go to all my stops and get home.

Anyway so there I am at the car and I putting the grocery bags into the car. In midst of this activity I had a problem which will now be played out in pictures so you can see how this played out:

I'm putting the groceries in one bag at a time when all of a sudden my boobs decided to be KNOWN 

Because this was nothing new, I decided to ignore it and continued what I was doing when....


BOTH MY TITS Bungee Jump out of my bra and literally rolled my bra into that porn star string of material that makes a great stirrup to grab a-hold of; something like this:

So then I'm all like:

I'm standing there boobs out under my shirt and jacket wondering how I would put them back in place and I go in search of my bra, which is like looking in a diamond cave for snacks.

Meanwhile my boobs are all like:


Now I still can't find my bra and now I'm pissed all like:

Then I'm like You Two need to get back in the bra! 

By gosh dammit this is what they did to me:


So then I'm like:

Then I say:

Then They're all like:

Eventually after some work, and trying to do it so decretely in the unusally crowded parking lot, I finally found my bra and pulled up as fast as I could
courtesy of this previous post

I couldn't help but think back to this one time in high school this happened but that was because my bra was too fucking big.....

What They Wanted To Do:



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